The Story of Soggy Toast....in Ten Parts...Part Seven

Part Seven: Being Windy like a Peanut

It has come to my attention recently that many cities across the states now take part in what can best be described as a Zombie Mob Day. A day where hundreds of people dress as zombies and wander the streets as if the rapture were happening now.
There is a part of me that really wants to support and possibly participate in such events, seeing as how the idea of the living dead has always been one of my favorite horror/creature subjects, and the wave of excitement that comes over me thinking about how finally the idea of zombies are becoming more widely accepted as a genre all it's own, thanks to such films as 28 Day Later (not entirely zombies, I know) and the, in my opinion, brilliant rethinking of Romero's Dawn of the Dead, as well as from Max Brook's books The Zombie Survival Guide and World War Z. But, at the same time, I almost feel as if I might be the only one who sees the dangers in such acceptance and with such events as the Zombie Mobs taking place.

One of the main reasons, in my opinion, to document and study the history of mankind and societies in general, is to learn from it. In other words, to learn from past mistakes. As individuals we are able to do this almost unfailingly. Hit a baby with a taser gun every time it tries to pet the salivating dog and eventually it'll stop trying, and most likely grow up with an unbelievable fear and hatred of dogs....but that's just a funny side effect.
As a collective we seem almost unable to do this. Hit a group of babies with a taser gun every time one tries to pet the dog and they'll blame one another, try to ban heavy metal and video games, but they'll keep trying to pet that damn dog! And will someone stop ringing that fucking bell?!!

Now, to bring this back to the subject of Zombie Mobs I'll give you all a few examples of where we should have learned better. First, Halloween....which gave people born with the condition known as "Rubber Face Syndrome", or as I like to call it, "Soup Face", a day that they could come out and mingle relatively free from blatant stares and persecution. The second, Mardi Gras....which introduced topless dancers into polite society.
And while both of these examples are relatively free of serious society altering side effects, they should at least give people pause to think about what could possibly happen when the undead feel free to join the masses of the living. I mean, just think about the number of people, in Florida especially but in other states as well, that had already been dead for sometime but still managed to vote for Bush in the past two elections!

Next I plan to combat the Tooth Fairy, who's very concept introduces children to prostitution by teaching them that it's not only ok but easy to sell your body for money.